The one where she broke her foot
I was having a lot of fun at a punk concert with a date. We were moving from gin and tonics to beer when he suddenly showed up with shots. I thought, ‘Yeah, why not?’ After the concert,
we went to his place, did the deed, and passed out. At 3:30 A.M., I woke up with throbbing pain in my ankle and couldn’t put any weight on it. I thought it was broken, maybe because
someone jumped on it when we were dancing. Half-asleep and still tipsy, I hopped into his kitchen and grabbed frozen spinach. I went back to bed, laid the spinach on my ankle, and
immediately fall back asleep. The next morning, there was spinach EVERYWHERE. In his sheets, all over his floor, even in the cracks of his wicker bed frame. He looked at me and just
said, ‘What the f*ck?’ I got out of there as fast as possible, and he didn’t even help me hobble down the stairs. An emergency clinic confirmed that I had fractured my foot, and I never
heard from my date again.